We knew all along it was a possibility, and honestly I am not ready to leave Germany let alone pack-up and move.  Earlier this month we got our orders.  Not an extension, but a full consecutive tour.  We are in Germany another three full years.

Most of me is really, really happy.  I love my new country, I’m so far away from learning everything I want to learn.  I’m so far away from exploring everything I want to explore.  I’m so far away from speaking perfect German.  I’m also so far away from my big boys.  And my parents.  And my sister.  And my in-laws.  And my two best friends in the whole, wide world.  There are days that beautiful Germany just can’t make up for that loss and I sit here and cry.  Sometimes I call them and make them cry too.

I am by nature a glass half-full kind of person, and my glass is way more than half-full, I just really miss my big boys.  I thought it be easier with them grown, and out of the house, yet not a day goes by I don’t get a phone call, email or skype from one of them needing my sage advice (shhhh, it’s my fantasy) or just to hear our voices.  Knowing that it’s hard on them too, having us so far, makes it even harder on me.

Don’t get me wrong, I love being an Army wife.  I love all the opportunities it has provided me, my family and my kids.  I am grateful for a steady job and the benefits.  I am proud of my soldier and his true patriotism.  It is one of the things I love deeply about him.  He strongly believes in our country and defending our freedoms.  As we head into the 4th of July holidays it’s on my mind just a little bit more. How incredibly spectacular our country is, with all it’s faults, in the freedoms and opportunities it provides.

Today though, I really miss my kids.  It’s been 2+ years since all six were home: