50 Shades of Green

Retirement is scary. It is stressful. There are all kinds of new worries. But. There are some good things. One of the good things, one the things I was so looking forward to, was the end of the 50 shades of green.

All you Army wives, and soldiers, know exactly what I’m talking about. Socks. The stupid not-one-shade-of-green-alike Army socks. The bane of our existence.

Every. Single. Week. For 20+ years. These socks, and I’m pretty sure some are original to Dave’s enlistment in the 1980’s, I’ve tried my damndest to match them. There is not one sock that truly matches another. Somehow, magically, the Army issues a different shade, including two shades per pair, every single time. This is what I’ve been looking forward to as retirement got closer. No more Army socks.

The thing is, Dave retired September 30, 2017. This picture, of his favorite socks, was taken today: February 3, 2018. Five months later and every single gorgeous, loved, uniquely shaded sock is still in our home. He loves them. They aren’t leaving.

I’m crying.

About the Author: Toiny

My name is Toiny (pronounced Twa-knee) and I am the Studio site owner and a Designer at heart. I especially love creating word arts and tools to help others create. I learned photoshop from my Father-in-Law while printing alien t-shirts for the tourists in Roswell, NM. Once I touched photoshop, I never let it go. It's a creative addiction! I currently live with four-out-of-six kids, my husband & two ornery cats in the Black Forest, Germany. Or as they say in German: Der Schwarzwald. I design under the name: Schwarzwald Design at the Studio.

7 Comments

Cindy 3 February 2018 at 2:37 pm - Reply

i thought it was tough matching plain old white or black socks. With three guys with different size feet wearing them. At one time I tried assigning each their own color and putting a dot on each sock when I got a new pack but that just made matching even more difficult. Now I only have hubby to wash socks for. He still complains about matching them according to wear and the size of hole in the toe. My daughter in law simply refuses to match socks and just piles all socks in one big basket. its everyone for themselves in the free for all basket early in the morning. What is the next generation coming to? My grand daughter came up with the best solution and called it ‘mixmax’ = mismatch when she was very young. Now they sell girls socks that way. If only l could get my hubby to wear one pink polka dot and one green stripe as if he meant to do that. C
- Toiny 4 February 2018 at 5:56 am - Reply
  
  Haha Cindy! If you ever get your hubby to wear one pink polka dot and one green stripe… I demand a photo! Tess wears mixmax socks too. Makes life so much easier!
Steph 3 February 2018 at 7:37 pm - Reply

Toiny – you are hilarious! I thought at least one of the pair was supposed to disappear! They do at my house!
Kathy Montgomery 5 February 2018 at 10:27 am - Reply

Hahaha! I recognized those socks right away-that is my life too! I wish you all the best in your transition from military life.
- Toiny 7 February 2018 at 8:49 am - Reply
  
  Thank you Kathy! I knew I wasn’t alone.
Donna Knighten 6 February 2018 at 5:22 pm - Reply

Funny! How about new socks for every occasion this year and NOT Army green!
- Toiny 7 February 2018 at 8:49 am - Reply
  
  I like this idea Donna!

50 Shades of Green