Eleven years ago I watched in horror as first tower two of the World Trade Center, and then tower one of the World Trade Center collapsed in an unbelievable cloud of smoke and dust.  My boys had just left for school and panic overwhelmed me thinking our whole country might be at war, and my kids not with me. I spent that day on the couch in tears, newborn Tess cradled in my arms.  Seeing the images again yesterday brought it all back.  The disbelieve, the confusion, the terror and the fear.
It is still unbelievable and incomprehensible to me: “Why?”. There are so many Why’s in the world today.  There have always been so many Why’s.  I am saddened by the plight of so many people around the world that live in fear, terror, deprivation and poverty.  I spent many hours of my youth volunteering with soup kitchens, physically & mentally challenged children and the poor, both in the states and in Mexico.  Like me David, my husband, feels a strong need to help.  His way was, and is, to serve in our military.  He is a strong believer in country, home and preserving the rights of our people.  Together we raised children that feel the same way.  All of our kids feel the need to Do Something to make the world a better place. I should be ecstatic that Christians quest to Do Something led him to follow in his fathers footsteps.
Earlier this year Christian signed-up and joined the US Marine Corp.  Yesterday, September 11th, very appropriately, was his first day of boot camp.  I cried. The last months I’ve cried alone, with David, and with Christian.  I am beyond proud of my son. It takes courage, bravery, commitment and patriotism to serve in todays military.  My son has all that and more.  I fear, though, for the things he will see, hear and do while serving.  I fear it will destroy the beautiful boy I love so much.  I fear he will sacrifice his life.  I feel horrible for believing so strongly in our military and the job they do, yet not wanting my children to do that job.  But there you have it.