I am having one of those black & white, yin & yang, two-faced kind of weeks. Half the time I’m deliriously happy, the other half I’m literally in tears. I’m thinking I need my regular, dependable schedule back. For as much as I love to travel and explore, being in my rhythm, my routine, seems to be a necessity to live my daily life.

Dave’s absence, currently in New Mexico: The Blue-Haired Sophomore, is keenly felt. I’m at a loss trying to make coffee for myself.  Seriously.  In one day only I made it with Golden Puffs in the basket instead of ground coffee; with the ground coffee in the water reservoir instead of, duh, water; and poured juice instead of milk into my finally-brewed-coffee.  I need him back if only to make me coffee before I make coffee. Dane has made it his life goal to make coffee just like dad in Dave’s absence. I have to admit, this mornings pot came really, really close!

In a case of worse-timing-ever, Tess started school the week I had no amazingest-coffee-maker-husband ever.  Because she’s back in American school, on the American base, she has to take the bus. Because we have a large family, and because I wanted them all to learn German, we live relatively far from base (relatively, because, in reality, this is the closest we’ve ever lived to base). This means I must first drive her to the bus that will take her to her school. At zero:dark:thirty, before I will even consider making coffee. And Dane is also not a morning person. The only good thing about the drive is that her bus stop is surrounded by fabulous Pokestop. I am addicted to the new Pokemon Go, and waiting for the bus with her is always a delight. Why just this morning I finally caught my very first Dratini!

The last of my friends, that are leaving, and actually, after this, we only have one couple left, are leaving this Friday. My heart is so heavy. Mr. Nate taught Dane to swim (Seepferdchen), and Amber has been my trusted companion on travel trips (Girls Weekend), either by my side or at home with my kids. My world is getting so much smaller. Tonight is “our” goodbye. I can’t do another airport goodbye (4th of July). Instead we are going for a nice, big beer (Mr. Chips Goodbye Beer; Emmett & the Ginormous Beer), per tradition. The last couple of goodbye’s have too been hard for me.  My trusty camera has stayed in it’s bag, at my feet.  My eyes too red & swollen to pose, or to lift the lens.  Tonight Dane is bringing the camera because “You forget too much.”

I’m not the only one that forgets to bring out the camera.  After almost two weeks, I had to push & prod Dave into taking a picture of my four big boys all together in New Mexico.  He sent me this last night. I cannot look at it without my heart aching. How I miss them all under my roof.  How I wish I could be there too.


Soren, Christian, Nick & Cole